Published On:Monday 7 May 2012

Top Stories of the day: Mamata Banerjee, Hillary Clinton, Air India Pilots, Kingfisher Airlines, Times of India, Pranab Mukherjee, Pratibha Patil, Saif Ali Khan, Agent Vinod


TOP STORIES OF THE DAY

Fuc*ingly Idiotic still worthy to read

India Satire introduces top stories of the day article. These will involve today's stories from Google News and the utter nonsense unreal stories by India Satire.

Top Headlines

1.     Mamata Banerjee and Hillary Clinton

Aamir Khan to meet Mamata Banerjee after meeting Rajasthan CM Ashok Gehlot to discuss the problems of cartoonists in drawing Mamata didi's cartoons

Mamata Banerjee assured that the US can set up their plants, offices and factories in the air, if the land availability issue prop ups in West Bengal

Hillary Clinton said to have learnt Mamata didi's conversion method of human being into dogs
According to sources, Hillary Clinton learnt from Mamata didi how to master the art of controlling / dominating 
Barack Obama

Mamata Banerjee told Hillary Clinton that West Bengal has opened up doors for FDI in hand-pulling rickshaws, panwalas and hawkers on the street. Hillary assured her that US will invest billions of dollars in these areas

Hillary said that she was happy that West Bengal had outsourced fewer jobs from US compared to South Indian states

2.     Air India and Kingfisher Airlines pilots' strike

100 Air India pilots took bulk sick leave together, government said that their salaries would not be freeze as per sick leave regulations

All Kingfisher Airlines pilots will go on strike tomorrow for salaries since January 2012; Vijay Mallya said that they will not receive salaries for the day of strike

Government said that if requires it can raise more Rs30000Cr as tax payer's money in India is readily available, Vijay Mallya applied for quasi-government status to President Pratibha Patil who was touring few remaining nations in the world

3.     Times of India

Times of India claims that it is the most followed news satire website in India

Times of India to charge royalty from Indian news satire websites for using its worthless content

Times of India most useful newspaper and website in India

·         It pays back all the money to readers by way of raddi by giving few useless supplements with Bombay Times
·         Its news website is fun tapping all the audiences kids, youth, middle-aged, old-aged, kids porno viewers, young porno viewvers, middle-aged porno viewers (like Abhishek Manu Singhvi) and old-aged porno viewers (like ND Tiwari)

4.     Pranab Mukherjee as a President candidate

Pranab Mukherjee was the funniest character of the week. Everybody includes opposition parties are supporting his candidature for president but he himself is not ready

UPA + all the allies,
+ BJP+ all its allies,
+Other parties
- Pranab Mukherjee
= confusion over President's post still on

5.     Agent Vinod; Saif Ali Khan

Mafia behind the agitation against me: Swami Nityananda demands Agent Vinod to find the truth

After a flop of Agent Vinod, Saif Ali Khan started a business of real estate agency; Real Estate Agent Vinod



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