Rakesh Jhunjhunwala finally bought new clothes on Diwali

01 Nov 2013 / 0 Comments

After some relief from recent stock market rally, big bull investor finally decided to buy new clothes on Diwali. According to sources, he lost all his clothes as his portfolio took a big hit in a big carnage in Indian stock markets that came by July end to August end this year. "Now I am ha

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Published On:Wednesday, 9 November 2011

Sugar cane price hike will reduce cost of statues by Rs2500Cr: Behenji Mayawati


Thrashing all the allegations about poll politics on cane price rise issue, Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister and BSP Supremo Mayawati (Behenji) said "I was feeling like having some diet as my weight is increasing day by day". She said "It was also a suggestion of Uttar Pardes statue strategist Shree Bipin Misra. He told me if I lose 5 kg weight the cost of raw materials of statues will reduce dramatically. After weight loss, every statue will save Rs5Cr and therefore every year it will save Rs500Cr. We have a 5 year plan to reduce cost by Rs2500Cr. This amount will be utilised for investing in sandal making factory, a boost to Pardes' leather industry. The entire process will come under Slim-Trim Statue Scheme (SSS)."

Sources said that out of no work Behenji saw huge gain in her weight. "Her weight is doubled after she became UP's chief minister first time and is famous as "Baby Elephant" in the political circles," said closed associate with Behenji with request of anonymity. "After reducing her weight, statue makers will reduce weight of elephant accordingly," he said.

"It is purely a law of economics as price increases demand decreases. It is good to see that Behenji is adopting the same principal in her life as well. I welcome this positive change of adopting SSS and I believe UP will progress, going forward," said Dr. Shankar Acharya, a well known economist.

India's most popular and most handsome (ponytail attached) economist, creative Surgeon Arindam Chaudhuri said "Dare to think beyond politics and make statues and dare to think beyond statues and make temples. Mayawati is actually a cream of politics and what she does is not categorised into conventional political system of India. I like people who think differently. She is actually a role model for many young people who will become Steve Jobs in a near future."

When asked if he has any plan to set up his own statues in all the IIPM colleges taking inspiration from Behenji. Arindamji blushed and said "What can I say? I don't like popularity but actually IIPM's working panel has decided to set up my statues with a pose of lecturer in all the colleges with proper focus on my ponytail (a symbol of intelligence)."

He said "I am planning to introduce a course called Masters in Statue Planning and Management. We are in talks with Behenji to become the brand ambassador of our course. We also plan to give a laptop with unique and unknown Mayawati wallpapers and screensavers to joining students."

However, political circle was hot after Behenji's announcement. "It was a vote bank politics. Behenji wants to lure farmer lobby while ignoring statue maker community. It is straight away a loss of Rs2500Cr to the community," said a senior BJP leader.

"I really respect statue maker community which is trapped by terror brain Mayawati. I asked all the statue makers to join Congress and we shall give you better prospects as Congress has many leaders whom they can set up statues and we commit them that they will be paid best."

Behenji thrashed all the allegations and said "This is a conspiracy against a dalit ki beti who wants Uttar Pardes to progress. I am saving Rs2500Cr straight away which will be utilised to provide employment to chamhar community."




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